Idleness, as if referring to a machine, confuses me when I
read about it according to faith. We are given a warning about spending time
with believers who are idle, yet I do not understand. Are we not all idle, in
some way or another? Or is that just my way out of taking those Holy words for
what they are? Are we not to persevere through the hard times with our fellow
believers, including times of idleness? “May the Lord direct your hearts into
God’s love and Christ’s perseverance,” is the verse in 2 Thessalonians directly
before the section on idleness, and our warning against it.
Often times, I wonder if I over-think even the simplest of
things, and if other people think about things the way I do. It doesn’t feel
like they do…I feel so alone in my thoughts and ideas, yet I feel there is a
purpose for it sometimes. I am not sure if it is a gift or a burden…or if it is
a gift, and the enemy also uses it to confuse me, and make me question
everything. Some would call it, in the gift perspective, discernment. Others
would say I think too much. I think it is both, but the confusing part of it is
that I cannot tell which is ruling when I’m in the midst of a struggle or
question. Like this idleness thing; my mind is telling me I am to break away
from the one I love because he is idle, but my heart is telling me that Jesus
is not black and white, and that He gains glory when we persevere and work
through hard times and disbelief. The Jesus I know would not have me abandon
one of his children when they are at their lowest point, but the God I hear in
this scripture, in 2 Thessalonians, tells me otherwise…that we are also weak,
and need not to be brought down by the idle believers we are around. So which
is it? Look out for ourselves, or look out for our brothers and sisters? I
guess I am being pretty black and white in that question, because whichever is
the right and good thing to do is pure, because everything good and right is
from God.
Why do I worry myself with the things of this world? Is not
God with me at all times? Is he not with my love at all times? If I knew that
in my heart, I wouldn’t question him and his goodness like I am right now.
Lord, forgive my failing faith and strength. Maybe we are not so unevenly
yoked, after all. For, I am just as weak and distant as he. The only difference
is I still want to grow closer to God, and I still want to live a life for
Jesus, alone. But, that’s a pretty big difference…one that can surely tear two
apart.
